Awkward Sex is Awesome Sex (and it Happens to Everyone!)

Confession time: I’m an awkward person. I’m shy and I have social anxiety. When people first meet me they don’t always notice, or they think “wow, this chick is so confident!” and I’m here to tell you that whatever confidence or ease I may present is all learned. And of course others meet me and still think I seem pretty damn nervous!

No matter the level of confidence any particular individual legitimately has or is faking, I have some news for you: sex is going to be awkward. Pretty much always. I have had sex with hundreds of people, not to brag, and there is usually at least one moment in every sexual encounter that doesn’t look like the movies. Unless it’s a movie with awkward characters having awkward sex, but even then those scenes lack authenticity (to me).

I decided to write a blog post declaring that I love awkward sex, because I love (almost all) sex and because I have had so many sex partners worry about me judging them for those less-than-perfect sex moments. Which always surprises me since at least half those moments tend to stem from my own awkwardness! But let me assure you: awkward sex is normal and just as great as all the other sorts of sex.

Personally, I love to laugh during sex. I love to ham it up. I love to be weird and suffer from being too earnest most of the time, so having a silly, messy or ridiculous time in bed is such a relief. There’s a time and a place for soulful, romantic gazing sex. Or hardcore porny sex. Or all the different kinds of sex wrapped into one experience! Honestly, though, sweet and comfy and funny sex is definitely a favorite for me. It’s OK to make a silly face, fall off the bed, or even fart (though hopefully not in my face, if you can help it!).

All I ever want from any sexual experience is for everyone involved to have fun, feel safe and enjoy spending time with everyone involved. To me, that is the true and pure meaning of sex! Human connection. It’s not a competition, it’s not a game, and we don’t need to be movie or porn stars. As my gym teacher used to say: “if you had fun, you won!”